How to Tell Your Date Bad News
by Wendee Mason

1. Be honest with them from the very beginning of the relationship that you are going to let them know when your feelings are hurt. Then when you actually tell them, they won't be surprised.
    
2. Let them know immediately that you are angry, hurt, embarrassed, ashamed. Don't hold off for days. Do this in private! If necessary, take them to another room to prevent embarrassment in front of others. You don't want to humiliate, just express your feelings.
    
3. Tell them how they offended you. Be specific, stating the actual example. Be accurate, don't exaggerate or dig up the past with, "You always do this to me."
    
4. Tell them how your feeing were hurt, and how you react when they do this to you. They need to know not only what they did, but the consequences of their actions.
    
5. Don't rant and rave. Be silent after expressing your thoughts. Let some space enter so they can feel what you're saying.
    
6. Touch them, hug them, kiss them, or initiate some physical contact. to let them know you are not going to withhold physical contact as punishment.
    
7. Tell them how important they are to you and that you value their friendship, love relationship, (whatever it may be).
    
8. Reaffirm that they are a good and worthwhile person. You do not think they are a bad person. You need to differentiate between doing a bad action and being a bad person.
    
9. End with an uplifting comment, a smile, a hug or a laugh. The situation is over and so is your reprimand. Don't bring it up again. Move on.